Asshats Abroad

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Recently, I’ve been getting email from YouTube saying that my video is on the top of YouTube. It doesn't tell me which of my videos is wildly successful or what top I'm supposed to have reached. Having posted a few on YT, I know they don’t send emails out saying such things.  Anyway, for fun I thought I’d succumb to the link bait.  

 

It took me to Toronto Drug Store, a very patriotic place that declares itself an Essential Part of Canadian Rx Network. I guess it must be true because there is a photo of a serious but handsome doctor—he’s in a white coat with a stethoscope around his neck so he’s got to be one.  Behind him is what I assume to be a nurse holding something that’s supposed to look like a patient’s chart and she’s got a stethoscope, too. (I figure that if she were a doctor she’d have to be wearing doctorly glasses.)  And, she’s got her head tilted to the side and her expression is reminiscent of someone watching kittens play with balls of yarn. Awwwh, how cute is that??

So, it’s an online pharmacy that features Viagra and Cialis (aka le Weekender) and the picture at the top right of a laughing couple drinking tea or coffee or maybe Jack Daniels suggests these pills are effective, because, well… LOOK at them! Actually, he may look like he thinks he’s about to partake in some serious rutting, she’s smiling because she spiked his tea/coffee/Jack with enough saltpetre to knock the sex drive out a 2,300 lb. bull for a month. 

To my surprise I discover the email and the pharmacy operate out of Russia.  Whaaa?  It seems that Ivan the Terrible Marketer, an asshatski sitting in Minsk, actually believes that when he lies to people to get them to his site, when he posts fake pictures of his offices with fake addresses, and fake diplomas, people will gladly order and pay for his boner fide pills.  People will trust that he sells the real deal, not the ones made with dead baby skin—oh, sorry, that’s the Chinese doing that (and why I never ever buy produce and seafood from China).  Man, he must be huffing some pretty powerful adhesives to think that this is the path to success.  I much prefer the Nigerian/UN/FBI scams—at least those are worth the read for their sheer entertainment value.